Silencing Self Doubt – The importance of self confidence as a deaf person.

Confidence is a life long journey. It comes with our experiences and beliefs and the balance of these changes throughout our lives. Growing up, I was not a confident teen. At the time, I would have said I was. However looking back and thinking about my actions and the things I subconsciously shied away from, I know I wasn’t. Being ‘different’ from everyone else in my life, gave me a constant complex of having to try to prove myself and keep up with others. I could have been unapologetically me, had I been confident enough. Had I been confident enough, I could have requested the accommodations I needed to always feel included, accepted and comfortable in whatever situations I found myself in. I think growing up, most teens feel pressure at some stage to conform to their peers and friendship groups in one way or another.

Being deaf in adulthood hasn’t been all that different either. There’s always the potential to fall into a perceived conformity with our surroundings, rather than speaking out about what we need. There are new challenges and issues. It often feels ‘easier’ to just accept the way things are, despite the struggle, rather than question or interrupt the flow of a situation.

The good news is, that as we grow older, we gain a deeper understanding of who we are and what we’re capable of. This is the beginning of empowerment.

I began to stop apologising, saying ‘Sorry’ when I couldn’t hear people (although this still slips out my mouth sometimes) and I make an effort to say ‘Please could you repeat / rephrase that?’ instead. Due to my earlier years, I have developed a determined and tenacious mindset. This has served me well. But of course there are people who lose hearing later in life and this can cause a huge knock in confidence. Rebuilding confidence is not easy. But you’re never alone. I don’t believe anyone feels 100% confident all of the time.

It’s important to remember that we are a vital and integral part of society and we should all value each others contributions. Deafness is a spectrum. It is a different way of experiencing the world, and it’s important that we recognise, celebrate and support this diversity. We should also remember that confidence is not something that we’re born with, but it’s a skill that can be developed and improved over time.

Why Should We Practice Self Confidence?

When we believe in ourselves, we’re more likely to take risks and pursue our goals. We’re more willing to step out of our comfort zone and try new things, even if they’re challenging. With confidence, we’re better equipped to handle setbacks and failures because we know that we have the ability to bounce back.

It also influences how we interact with others. When we’re confident, we’re more likely to communicate clearly and assertively, being able to express our opinions and advocate for ourselves, which can lead to greater success and happiness. This is key to our wellbeing.

We still live in a world that often undermines confidence, with messages of perfectionism, unrealistic beauty standards, and social comparison. Past experiences can also have a lasting negative impact on our confidence levels.

Boosting Your Self Confidence

Fortunately, there are some strategies that can help us build and maintain confidence. I’ve learned, particularly through our online community, Deaf Club, that we have diverse skills, talents and interests. Surrounding ourselves with supportive and encouraging people can have a positive impact on our confidence levels. When we’re surrounded by people who believe in us and encourage us to pursue our goals, we’re more likely to believe in ourselves and have the confidence to for it!

1. Focus on your strengths: Make a list of your skills, accomplishments, and positive attributes, and reflect on them regularly to reinforce your self-worth. Then add your deaf strengths to these too!

2. Challenge negative self-talk: Replace negative self-talk with positive affirmations that reinforce your abilities and worth. Often the way we speak to ourselves, is more harmful than the way we’d ever speak to others!

3. Take care of yourself: Engage in activities that make you feel good – such as exercise, healthy eating and self-care.

4. Set achievable goals: Set goals that stretch your abilities but are still achievable. When you accomplish them, you’ll gain a sense of pride that boosts your confidence.

5. Learn new skills: Take classes or workshops to learn new skills or engage in activities that challenge you and help you grow – see life long learning.

6. Practice assertiveness: Express your opinions and needs assertively. Stand up for yourself when necessary. The more you’re able to do this, the more likely you are to have your accommodations met.

7. Surround yourself with supportive people: Surround yourself with people who believe in you and encourage you to pursue your goals – such as our online deaf community!

8. Visualise success: Visualise yourself succeeding in situations that make you feel nervous or unsure. This can give you a greater sense of deaf confidence and help you feel more prepared for these situations.

9. Learn from failure: Don’t let failure discourage you. Instead, learn from these situations and use them as opportunities for growth. We win, or we learn!

10. Celebrate your successes: Take time to celebrate your successes, no matter how small. This can help to boost your confidence and reinforce your belief in yourself. Share your successes with us in deaf club – we love celebrating and congratulating our members!

Building confidence is a continuous and ongoing process that requires effort, patience, and perseverance. It’s not something that can be achieved overnight and it requires a commitment to personal reflection, growth and improvement.

By working on our confidence, we can develop a strong sense of self-worth and resilience that can help us through life’s ups and downs as well as being able to grasp new opportunities as they come along.

Ultimately, the process of building confidence is not just about achieving a specific outcome or accomplishment, but it’s about developing a deeper sense of self-awareness and self-acceptance that can enrich all our lives in meaningful ways. Especially when we do this together! The power of community when I’m having a not-so-good day, is amazing!

I am deaf. I am proud. I am determined.
I am grateful for my deafness and the strength and resilience it has given me.

Come and join our network of deaf people. Feel supported and empowered – and create and share some affirmations with us.  You CAN do it!